Funky 29th


A few days ago, I celebrated my 29th. My birthday has become rather ordinary. No fancy dinner with family and friends. Literally none. I have become more practical nowadays (more like broke every time!).

The 26th of June has merely become a validation that another year adds to my age. Seriously speaking, I’m not getting any younger and because of that fact, I’m up to a different start.

Career-wise, I’m looking farther ahead. I love doing my job. I do my best in everything I do (Personal love department is an exemption to that rule! hahaha… I’m miserable in that aspect.) There’s nothing more satisfying than capping the day off without worrying about the things I didn’t do. If I can be a few steps ahead to avoid conflict, I try to be.

I realized that my love for the work that I do and the time and effort I put into it demand a reciprocation in a professional sense. Personally speaking, as an employee, it’s really important to be reassured that you are supported by the institution you work for, that you are presented with a clear blueprint of what they can offer aside from the commissions or monthly salary you are entitled to receive or the opportunity of establishing connections with clients, superiors and co-workers.

In my case, I put a good number of hours (12 hours or so) into my work-Not a big deal for me. What probably turns off some if not all employees the most is when the company cares more about the hours they spent or didn’t spend rather than the output. Hours bring in money-this I understand clearly. However, there should be more to a company than counting the amount of time an employee puts in for them and the profit they generate.

Career pathway and growth opportunities. What are the chances of elevating through the career arc in the organization? How long will it take? Will it benefit me when I leave work for a different organization? I’ve considered these thoughts early on. Clearly, the work culture and values are different for every company. Some would say they do offer such opportunities but later on employees realize that the conditions surrounding it exploits the workforce and disrupts work-life balance. Just wanted to point out that good-earning companies must be able to provide killer perks for their staff. It doesn’t hurt much to be able to extend care to your workforce beyond the benefits they enjoy mandated by law.


What I am trying to say is, I crave professional growth. There are those that I can do but some things only the company can provide. If there is one thing I dislike in life the most, that would be not growing in my career while meeting expectations. I am meant to do more and I don’t intend to stagnate in my career. There is no other way for me but to move forward.


Be Very Afraid

Most of us attempt to figure the meaning of our lives. A distinct human nature to preserve self. It is in this process that we are able to fill the gaps of our existence. As events unfold and are individually experienced, we are confronted with contrasting thoughts and feelings. Our worldview takes on a new frame of reference.


A constant in every life’s eventual adventure is CHANGE (surprise!).

It is the uncertainty of details and the resulting end during the process of change that causes conflict in a person. In our engagement with the unknown we are unable to control the entirety of the circumstance hence, we develop fear. Such threatens the very foundation of our existence.

Venturing into an uncharted territory can be daunting. It’s like blindly going for an off-road adventure. But then, we have to keep in mind that life is buoyant. It is deeply rich and involving and whether we like it or not, so are our feelings! Apparently, we will always be in a roller coaster of emotions and contrasting thoughts. At least we know this for a fact (or not). Makes me wonder if other species reckon us as walking contradictions. ðŸ˜‚

Ambiguity is Life’s game. It can paralyze or overwhelm our being which can hinder us from fully exploiting the opportunity of discovering what life has in store for us-good or bad. Let’s be real here. Nobody assured us of a good life without having to work hard for it. And sometimes, no matter how hard we work for something, we still fail at it. This is reality.

It also pays to be cynical at times-not recommending you do the same. ðŸ˜‚  I’d rather be cynical (done in moderation) than have false expectations. I wouldn’t want to witness myself choking on my own fantasy and eventually dying from it. That would be too tragic!)

So, if you fear change, be very afraid. You have all the right to be. Let your fear isolate you from the world so you can find your real strength and discover where your courage lies. And when you are ready, surface with compassion, confidence, wisdom and vitality to face life’s many more ambiguous adventures.


Mulino Sa Takipsilim

Manila is big, let alone the entire country (Philippines) with more than 7,100 islands. Living in the metro has its merits. With larger labor markets, the percentage of landing a job suited to one’s skills is higher. People can pursue careers that are not offered in small towns or small cities.

As a small town girl, I needed change a few years ago. My daily routine, the people I socialize with and the place I was in became a little too comfortable. I was becoming mediocre. I feared that the fire I have in me will eventually extinguish if I continuously let myself drown to the comforts of my hometown. One day, I packed my bags and decided to move to the big city. I took the plunge. Knowing myself, I knew I could easily adapt to the pace of life in the metro. I embraced the change and immersed myself to my new home.

I have been residing in the metro for a few years now and while I took advantage of the opportunities it offered, it had not been the kind of home I prayed it would be, so time and time again, I go back to the place where I almost entirely lost myself-Ilocos Norte; where I was to drown but remained afloat because of the impassioned nurturing from family and friends over the years.

Whenever I’m in Ilocos Norte, a sense of peace and contentment awash my being. It is home and it will always be. So here’s a short clip of the wind turbines (mulino) and some words I’ve put together in Filipino from my previous trip to my hometown.



Malacañang of the North










The Unofficial Nirvana In Fire Ending You’ve Never Seen

Two years after the release of Nirvana In Fire, the drama series is still gaining more and more popularity in Asia. As an avid fan of the drama series, I have tried my utmost best to dissect each and every episode there is in the drama including the closing credits. It came to a point where I just had to watch it from beginning to end. I am now on my 30th time. Let me tell you, it is tediously satisfying!


At one point, I felt that Xiao Shu/Lin Shu/Su Zhe/Mei Changsu was robbed of the opportunity to inherit what is his, but then, it also made sense that the writer and director didn’t want to give the viewers false hope that Xiao Shu/Lin Shu/Su Zhe/Mei Changsu will survive in the end since it is a common knowledge that he is gravely ill.

If you paid more attention to the conversations in the drama, Consort Jing once mentioned to Jingyan after the latter found out that Su Zhe/Mei Changsu is indeed Xiao Shu, “…he’s been past enduring already.” With this and the countless times he got awfully sick to the point of impossible recovery if not for the vast knowledge of the physicians looking after him, it is very highly possible that he’ll die by the end of the series. Like some of you, I tried to hang onto the last thread of hope I could muster.

Then this happened.

《琅琊榜》未删减版结局 Unofficial cut ending of Nirvana in Fire_11

Xiao Shu/Lin Shu/Su Zhe/Mei Changsu DIED like what most predicted.

But then, this not the end for those with enduring hearts!! 😁😁

When the last episode of Nirvana in Fire (raw and without subs) was uploaded online for the first time in 2016, it came with an alternate ending (unofficial ending). A few days after it was subbed, I watched the 54th episode on the same streaming site and it was unfortunate that the unofficial ending was edited out. I tried watching from other sites but to no avail. Luckily, I was able to come across a clip with more or less six thousand views on YouTube with the same scene I saw from that 2016 raw video.

If the production added the alternate ending, then the scene below would have made much more sense.

(360P - mp4)Nirvana in Fire Episode 52_3

Well, it is up to you decide whether Fei Liu’s words made sense. Sharing everyone GIFs of that magical unofficial ending. Enjoy!

《琅琊榜》未删减版结局 Unofficial cut ending of Nirvana in Fire_1

Fei Liu diligently learning how to serve tea. What a good boy!


《琅琊榜》未删减版结局 Unofficial cut ending of Nirvana in Fire_3

He gets nervous doing this kind of stuff but he’s all brave and mighty when he goes out to play with the bad guys.


《琅琊榜》未删减版结局 Unofficial cut ending of Nirvana in Fire_4

Lin Chin pretending he’s not paying attention to Fei Liu. What a considerate fellow! I like it better when they bicker.


《琅琊榜》未删减版结局 Unofficial cut ending of Nirvana in Fire_5

Don’t scald your hands, Fei Liu. Su gege will worry!


《琅琊榜》未删减版结局 Unofficial cut ending of Nirvana in Fire_6

The moment of truth is here!


《琅琊榜》未删减版结局 Unofficial cut ending of Nirvana in Fire_8

Great effort, Fei Liu. It passed Lin Chen gege’s standards.


Su, who is he offering it to? (pun-intended 😅😂🤣)

《琅琊榜》未删减版结局 Unofficial cut ending of Nirvana in Fire_10

And they lived happily ever after!


There you have it folks!


Don’t forget to watch Nirvana In Fire 2!